Munna Bhai M.B.B.S. (2003) Poster

Sanjay Dutt: Murli Prasad 'Munna Bhai' Sharma



  • Murli Prasad Sharma : Circuit, did you know that there are 206 bones in the body?... We never thought about that while breaking them, did we?

  • Circuit : [Answering the phone]  Who is this?

    Murli Prasad Sharma : Its your dadm who do you think?

    Circuit : Bro, How are you Bro?

    Murli Prasad Sharma : i need a body

    Circuit : Body? who's body Bro?

    Murli Prasad Sharma : you know, the one they use for dissection, one of those bodies.

    Circuit : Bro, how am i going to find one of those bodies?

    Murli Prasad Sharma : how would i know? just find one!

    Circuit : Dump the tension bro, you concentrate on your studies, i'll organize a body

    [he looks out onto the street and see's a chinese tourist taking pictures of some of the other gang members posing for the camera] 

    Circuit : Bro, will an imported body do?

    Murli Prasad Sharma : yeah it will, just bring it quickly!

    Circuit : i'll be there in ten minutes bro, just ten minutes!

    Circuit : Hey Butkya... get a sack

    Butkya : Right away

    [leaves to get a sack] 

    Chinese tourist : [taking pictures of Munna's gang members posing for the camera while doing there laundry]  Thankyou! Thankyou!

    Circuit : [walking to the chinese tourist]  hey Chilli chicken, you wanna take some photos of an ambulance, its a five-star ambulance?

    Chinese tourist : No, i want real india, poor people, hungry people!

    Circuit : poor hungry people, inside the ambulance, they are really bleurghh!

    Chinese tourist : Really? okay good!

    Circuit : Hey Hakka Noodle, youve come in from abroad and you only wanna see naked, hungry people, dont you want to see the taj mahal?

    Chinese tourist : no no, hungry and poor men!

    Butkya : [Runs up with a small shopping bag]  Bro will this bag do?

    Circuit : [looks at the bag, takes and it whacks him across the head with it]  you stupid! how the hell am i going to fit him in? am i going to fold him in there? hey you?

    [to the chinese tourist] 

    Circuit : How long are you?

    Chinese tourist : 5 foot six

    Circuit : [to the gang member]  get a six foot bag!

    [to the chinese tourist] 

    Circuit : you come with me, you dont want to see taj mahal, i will show you hungry indian!

    [leads him into the ambulance] 

    Chinese tourist : [from inside the ambulance, as circuit knocks him out]  Argh!

  • Dr. J. Asthana : May I ask what is happening here?

    Murli Prasad Sharma : No!

  • Murli Prasad Sharma : [slapping a goon]  You over-acting piece of@#%! You're supposed to have a kidney problem, and instead you have a heart attack!

    [He points to another goon disguised as a patient] 

    Murli Prasad Sharma : Look at this chap - what a natural actor! He's been playing the same role for three years and Papa's never recognised him!

  • Murli Prasad Sharma : Hey circuit, check this out, who would want to marry a cry baby? he tries to commit suicide after a six month fling! Hey

    [talks to the boy in the hospital bed] 

    Murli Prasad Sharma : your mother has loved you all your life, can't you stay alive for her?

  • Murli Prasad Sharma : It's just what I feared... lymphoma of the intestines...

  • Circuit : Bro, if it hurts you so much, why don't you tell your father the truth? Tell him that a don gets more respect in this city than any damn doc!

    Murli Prasad Sharma : He'll die if he comes to know - it's just a matter of seven days, Circuit, give it a rest...

  • Dr. J. Asthana : Are there any questions?

    Murli Prasad Sharma : Yes, sir... If a man is dying in the admission ward, is it necessary for him to fill our a form?

    [a shocked Asthana dismisses the class, but the next day... ] 

    Murli Prasad Sharma : Sir, I asked you a question yesterday that you didn't answer - can't you answer it today?

  • Murli Prasad Sharma : Wow, Anand bhai, you look like a hero! All the nurses are going to fight over you!

  • Dr. J. Asthana : Can I ask what is going on here?

    Murli Prasad Sharma : Ask! Don't be shy, ask. Come on, ask!

  • [Circuit and Munna have just kidnapped someone] 

    Murli Prasad Sharma : Circuit, I said "Point the gun," not "Shoot out all of Mumbai!"

    Circuit : Chill out, bro - these are blanks, they only sting!

    [He grabs their captive, who was trying to escape] 

    Circuit : Hey, Flo Jo, even THEY can do the job at close range! Do you want me to try it out?

  • [Circuit has received a telegram from Hari Prasad Sharma about his arrival] 

    Murli Prasad Sharma : When?

    Circuit : Today, at five o'clock!

    Murli Prasad Sharma : Damn! We're screwed!

  • Murli Prasad Sharma : [seeing goons taking down the hospital sign]  HEY! Don't touch that signboard! My father's name is on that sign! Hands off! Bastards! Don't you dare!

    [He goes berserk, and has to be restrained by Circuit] 

  • Murli Prasad Sharma : Circuit, I've decided I'm going to be a doctor...

    Circuit : Uh... bro, why don't you go to sleep, and we'll talk about it in the morning...

    Murli Prasad Sharma : I knew you'd say that - you think I'm sloshed, don't you? I'm serious!

    Circuit : But, bro, what's the point?

    Murli Prasad Sharma : The point? Circuit, the point is that my father will be proud of me! You should've been there - that baldy stood there insulting my father, and I just kept quiet! I'll show him! I'll become a doctor like him and marry his daughter! Circuit, find me the best medical college in Mumbai...!

  • [Munnabhai is on the phone when his gang tells him he has entered the college] 

    Murli Prasad Sharma : Ninavati Hospital? Hang on a moment! Lilavati Hospital? I can't come to work today! Apollo Hospital? Hold your horses! Huh? Bread Candy Hospital? Hold, man, hold, I am busy...

    [He hangs up and with Circuit and the others, rushes off to celebrate] 

  • Murli Prasad Sharma : [singing]  My name? You haven't heard yet? Munnabhai... M.B.B.S.!

  • [Circuit accompanies Munnabhai to his college room] 

    Circuit : [looking around]  What the...? It ends almost right where it begins!

    Murli Prasad Sharma : Circuit, do you know why God sent me to this college?

    Circuit : God certainly never told me!

    Murli Prasad Sharma : Because he wants me to settle a score with the man who made my father cry!

    Circuit : Okay, if it's settled with God, all right!

  • Murli Prasad Sharma : Circuit, I'm missing Mom. I keep remembering her.

    Circuit : Your memory is very solid, man, so solid that I can see her. Hey, are you missing Dad also. I can see him too.

  • Murli Prasad Sharma : Circuit, have you ever felt as though you were going to die?

    Circuit : You know that dude Shakeel?

    Murli Prasad Sharma : Yeah?

    Circuit : He once went after me with a knife - I thought I was gonna go that day!

    Murli Prasad Sharma : Not that, Circuit - I meant, have you ever felt as though you were fatally ill, and could only wait, helpless? Watching the clock and calendar go by like a time bomb, and your life, your dreams coming face to face with THE END...

    Circuit : Bro, my mother used to say that we became stars when we die...

    [He starts pointing at stars in the sky] 

    Circuit : Look, there's my father - the bugger used to beat me a lot! And there's Uncle - he was a cool dude! Hey... where's Mom? Aaah, Mumbai's getting too polluted, man...

  • [after Munna is expelled, he and Circuit are wandering around in a drunken stupor] 

    Murli Prasad Sharma : Circuit, I've decided I'm going back to the village!

    Circuit : [flourishing two tickets]  I knew it - that's why I've brought TWO railway tickets!

    Murli Prasad Sharma : But what will you do in the village? You can't even handle a plough!

    Circuit : Bro, if I do that, then what will the cows do?

  • Dr. Suman Asthana : [about Anand]  Murli, what's the point of talking to him? Nothing you say to him will reach his ears!

    Murli Prasad Sharma : So what if his ears can't hear it, he hears it with his heart! You see, when two people share a strong connection, then they can communicate to each other through their hearts...

    Dr. Suman Asthana : You're too much, Murli...

    [She leaves, but Munna tries to prove his point] 

    Murli Prasad Sharma : [thinking]  Ms. Suman, I hope you can hear me...

    [No response] 

    Murli Prasad Sharma : [thinking]  Mike testing, 1, 2, 3...

    [No response] 

    Murli Prasad Sharma : [thinking]  Ms. Suman, I think I'm in love with you...

    [At this, Suman finally turns and looks at Munna. She smiles, blushes and leaves] 

See also

Release Dates | Official Sites | Company Credits | Filming & Production | Technical Specs

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